By Patrick F. Cannon

I was watching an interesting program on the Science Channel about the reopening of a four-hundred-year-old mine in England’s County of  Cornwall. It seems the ancient mine, which once produced copper and tin, is now known to contain Lithium, a key element in modern battery production. When the program was over, there was a promo for an upcoming feature on the continuing search for Bigfoot, or Sasquatch, if you prefer the scientific moniker.

            In case you have missed it, Bigfoot is a giant, human- like creature that roams the forests of our great Northwest, often sighted by hiking scientists, but so far never captured. Occasionally, a lucky hiker spots one and takes a murky photo or video of it. They seem to be about 8 feet tall, proportioned like a human (decidedly not like an ape or bear), covered in hair, and looking quizzically at the camera wielder. None, at least so far, has waved, or sauntered over to say howdy.

            You would think, given our modern tracking devices, we would have long since been able to corner one and toss a net over him, but no luck so far. Nor have our friends and fellow scientists in the distant Himalayas, where a similar creature called the Abominable Snowman (scientific name: Yeti) is said to roam. They may be related, but the Yeti has white fur, no doubt a climatic adaptation, like the Polar Bear or the Snowshoe Rabbit.

Failure to catch one of the creatures has not dissuaded the intrepid scientists, who seemingly will continue their searches so long as the Science Channel keeps supporting their efforts. We also have this and other channels to thank for not giving up hope that one day they will capture a life form from outer space.   

Of course, there have been numerous books, movies and television shows that present us with a little green man or two. Who can forget the charming ET? Sometimes they even look like John Lithgow, to fool us into thinking they’re just like us (heaven forbid). I’ve lost count of the number of folks who have been abducted and held against their will in a flying saucer or dinner plate. After hurtling through the cosmos and visiting strange and wonderful planets, the captives are released to warn us to mend our ways or suffer unimaginable woe.

Now, the universe is really big, and its vastness might include planets that can, like ours, support life in some form. Apparently, there are scientists sending messages through the ether in hope someone out there will hear them and respond. I’m sorry to say, so far only silence. I have no problem with them continuing to keep trying if it doesn’t cost too much.

Many of your fellow citizens believe that little green men have managed to reach our planet, and they’re being studied at a remote place in Nevada called “Area 51.” The government claims it’s a secret facility for testing advanced aircraft, but they would say that, wouldn’t they? Or at least according to the conspiracy theorists who have found their own niche on the Science and other “reality” channels. On the surface, the aircraft testing claim seems plausible, but what happens underground?

Could the government be breeding more little green people? If so, to what end? Are they way smarter than us? Could they solve the mystery of what goes on in Donald Trump’s brain? Or explain the popularity of the Avocado? Or – and I know this is a stretch – explain to me what was wrong with the old math?

Copyright 2025, Patrick F. Cannon

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